Step One: Take One step

Liliana took her official first steps today October 27th. It was only a couple very shaky ones and we got one step on video. Congrats baby girl! 2 videos: 1 is this morning and the other is late afternoon- what a difference a day makes!

Lube and Oil Change please!

Okay, just a very quick note here to say how extrememly annoyed I am. This is a TMI post so for those of you who just want updates on Liliana, come back in a few days...
At my last Gynie appointment I expressed to my doctor that we were interested in having another baby but in was kinda hurty if you know what I mean...So she recommends Barbara Walter's favorite product Astroglide! Well, been trying to conceive for the last several months only to find out that personal lubricants such as KY and Astroglide slow down or stop sperm motility.
Great, thanks Doc!
Grrrrr.

The Science of Sleep

Sleep seems to be an issue in our household lately. I love sleep. Nothing I love more than pulling back the covers to reveal freshly washed sheets and sliding my way under the fluffy down comforter and feeling the soft linens against my freshly shaven legs. Then a lay my head back on the puffy down pillow and open the pages of a good book and lose myself for an hour or two into a fictional world. After, I turn out the light, snuggle down into the pillow and fall into deep, wonderful dreams. Ahhhh, I love that- cue the sound of a needle being dragged over a vinyl LP. REALITY: I make my way over 5 days worth of shedded clothes on my side of the bed and add to the pile by kicking off my sweat pants before pulling the fitted sheet back onto the mattress to get it as taught as I can- then I brush off any crumbs that might be there as remnants from my feet the night before after having walked over bits of cereal bars or cheerios. As I am about to get into bed I hear Chris whispering from the hallway that he wanted to change the sheets tonight but I. am. too. tired. I can't possibly help or even wait to have that done- tomorrow- let's do it tomorrow. So I get into bed to feel the stubble on my legs and my 5 months since last pedicure feet snag on the sheets. I commandeer my pillow from Chris' side of the bed which was most recently used as a big ear muff to keep him from hearing Liliana in the morning. I fluff it up, grab my book, read the same page that I have read the last 3 nights- still doesn't seem familiar- then I turn out the light and pass out. Ahhhh, then I wake up 4 hours later in a panic over job, money, Liliana, future embryo Kminek, the numerous cats in our house...
Chris and I seem to alternate our insomniac schedules- I can get a decent night's sleep on the nights he is downstairs watching Steve Carell in Get Smart or The Great Escape for the 50th time. He is upstairs snoring away on the nights I am down here chatting with other insomniac friends on Facebook. And then there is Liliana- sleeping. She is a champion sleeper. For those of you who have been reading my blog since the beginning you know what a great sleeper she is and how lucky we feel for that. She is going through a new phase though that has Chris and I stressed out. Chris hit the nail on the head tonight when he described it as separation anxiety. After all the night time rituals of bath, book, then bed she normally grabs Wally Kowalski her beloved Koala and rolls onto her side and it OUT. The last week though she has been crying the second we put her in the crib. Not a little cry but immediately goes for the crying without breathing method as she has her head bent while on all fours. Then as we go to leave the room, she stands at the side of the crib and SCREAMS. We kiss her, tell her we love her and GET THE HELL OUT of the room. The cries of sadness turn into cries of anger. She yells and screams. Chris is obsessed with the monitor. He turns it on to listen to the level of distress in her cries. I go by the idea of turning the monitor all the way down and watching the pretty red lights jump around or, better yet, turn that sucker off! We don't even NEED the monitor, we can hear her crying just fine without it. We won't go to her though. She needs to fall asleep- she is one smart cookie and knows if we come get her that it will become habit and all she has to do is cry her ass off and we will come get her for just a little more playtime with mommy and daddy. That is what we had been doing but enough is enough! So cry it out method activate! Seems to be working. She is only screaming for about 15 minutes now down from 45 minutes at the longest. Then she sleeps like the sleeping rock star she has always been.

Liliana Facts at 13.5 months:

• standing occasionally unassisted for a few seconds
• walks with only holding one hand but looks like a baby chimp while doing it
  
• crawls as fast as the wind
• says dada incessantly and has yet to utter anything close to mama
• hates carrots
• loves kitties- got her first kitty scratch on the back of her hand and seems very proud of it .
  
• kisses everything
• is starting to get into the muppets for 3 minute stretches
• is loved so insanely much by her parents I am afraid we are going to damage her with all the squeezing
• is going to be an octopus for Halloween

Hello Fall

The weather is turning cooler and I am realizing how warm weather makes having an active toddler an easier state of being. All of us in our mom's group are searching out other alternatives for entertainment like music and play classes but I am amazed (or actually not amazed at all) at how expensive they are. The other problem is the times they are held would make sticking to a nap schedule impossible. To me, Liliana's sleep is the most important so life needs to revolve around her naps and not the other way around. Today we are going to stop by a small Children's Museum which is walking distance from our house. This could be a great, inexpensive alternative for this shoestring budget household!
Since Mercury went direct, my previously chaotic life and mind seem to have calmed quite a bit. You may or may not believe it but I have MANY friends that can tell you this shit is for real!
I feel concerned still about work but know that I am doing the best I can and have received a couple amazing compliments from clients which, to me, is what it is all about. It just helped reinforce that I am good at what I do but sometimes things are out of your control.
Baby #2 still eludes us and it gets more difficult every month but this month I only took 2 pregnancy tests so I am less freaky about it now. Maybe next time I will actually wait until I miss my period instead of counting down to exactly 4 days before I expect it, holding my pee in all night and then running to the bathroom when I can't hold it anymore to pee on the stick. Then when it says NOT PREGNANT I won't be convincing myself that I took it too early, that my pee was too diluted etc etc...I know it will happen, I do, I do, I do.
Liliana is going to be a wonderful big sister when the time is right. Right now, life is so beautiful with our family of 3. No matter how crazy things are on the outside, when I look at her I instantly become peaceful and warm. We are having a blast. I have to say 1 more time the Chris is an amazing father- I love him and my family.