Life as we know it

Tomorrow marks Liliana's 9 month birthday. Chris and I were talking this morning and we both said we are trying so hard to live in the moment. Not only with Liliana but with each other and ourselves. We are both very nostalgic people and I can only speak for myself but few things make me emotional like thinking of the past. I am easily affected by movies and shows that speed through the characters lives and recap the storyline through flashbacks or memories. The final episode of Six Feet Under had me holding back tears as hard as a could because I felt ridiculous crying about a television show. Still, my lips were quivering uncontrollably and I had a huge lump in my throat as I learned the fate of all the characters I had become so close to through years of faithful viewing. Then last night I had the same reaction to the movie Marley and Me (I never read the book). Not sure if it hit so close to home because we had just put Zeppo down and we are starting our own family, but I cried. This time I didn't hold it back- I don't care any longer if it is ridiculous or not- I wanted to cry so I did. I think it is one of those lessons you learn as you get older. The movie isn't deep or terribly philosophical but something about it resonates with me. In the end the oldest boy is watching video of himself as a baby with Marley. I recognized at that moment that I have my own family and together we are making memories for Liliana. I also realized we need a better video camera to start documenting her life more actively than we have been.
Okay, so on to new Liliana activities:
Her clapping is waning- I think the novelty wore off. She now likes to watch her hand open and close- very intently. She has taken raspberry noises to a new level. Two nights ago after I put her to bed, she was making raspberries loud and strong for close to 5 minutes. I almost wet my pants I was laughing so hard. It could be due to the intense teething going on. Also when she is alone in bed she laughs at Wally Kowalski (her stuffed Koala). She holds him and laughs- it is really wonderful to hear. She still is not crawling but it giving it a great effort. New prediction- 2 weeks from today she will be crawling. She is standing with support- very strong legs. She loves to stand on her changing table and look at the 2 cat pictures on her wall- that is her latest fascination- she LOVES those pictures!!
Watching her learn new stuff will never get old for me. For example, there is an elephant head on her Jumperoo. The face is turned away from her and is on a resistant spring. I turned it around for her one day and it snapped back. She tried to turn it around herself after that but was just pulling on the head so it didn't turn. The next time I put her in the jumperoo a couple of days later she turned it around with no problem- the kid is a genius. This morning I gave her a tube of blistex and a tub of lip ointment to play with (I was in bed and that is what was on my nightstand). She held one in each hand and examined both very intently. Then she started gently hitting them together. I relayed this to Chris (b/c in my mind it is something pretty cool) and he said "great! she now has a brain of a Neanderthal- making progress!" It was funny.
Finally, we spent the last couple of days with Chris' family who is in town visiting. Yesterday was cousin Maximillian's 2nd birthday. She really enjoyed being around Max. He would give her kisses. She is learning how to kiss back. She puts her lips on my face when I ask for a kiss- I love it so much!
So my long weekend with Liliana is coming to an end. She is about to wake from her morning nap. We have a Memorial Day BBQ down the street later today (weather permitting). I love being with her so much and have major nanny anxiety lately. I will save that for the next post-

Esther Williams Eat Your Heart Out!

My well traveled baby, Chris and I have just returned from a long weekend in Florida visiting Chris' parents. We left during what was looking like Spring in Chicago. We were prepared with infant sunscreen, sweet sun hats, swim diapers, cute floaty toy for the pool and tiny sunglasses. I remembered to pack a swimsuit for myself and enough underwear to get me through the weekend- boy have my priorities changed!
While in Florida Liliana showed us that she is REALLY close to crawling but failed to achieve that milestone on vacation like I had hoped. I just have a feeling I am going to miss this one- I imagine it will happen one day while I am at work- hmmph.
She loved the pool and felt at home in her new floaty toy. She seemed to really enjoy the incredible heat in Florida. She ate great, slept great and was just so much fun to be around all weekend. She claps constantly and just loves life from what I can tell.
She has mastered the art of squealing incredibly loud. This is cute but caused a little shock on the airplane. My initial reaction was to put my hand over her mouth but I quickly realized that was not going to work- she wouldn't understand what that means.

Alright, I need to start taking notes for the blog. I have so many thoughts and ideas to write about but when it comes time to update, all I can think of to say is- ah, she is great, cute, fun blah blah blah. I swear I have an inner writer in me but she hasn't been unleashed. Maybe I shouldn't be blogging while trying to watch the Real Housewives Reunion show.

Next time, detailed notes will hopefully result in a more detailed, insightful entry.

Time Flies

I don't have much to report but always feel the need to continue to update the blog. I imagine major milestones are just around the corner such as crawling, standing, walking, school, college, marriage... We are currently holding steady at sitting but she has it mastered! I am adding this part about 2 hours after initial posting- I noticed that she has learned to clap! I need to look this up and see if she is a genius or if this is normal.

Today is actually her 8 month birthday. She is now sleeping solidly through the night anywhere between 11-13 hours. She enjoys solitary play-I can plop her on the floor or in the pack n' play with some toys and she is entertained. I can only do it for a short time though b/c I don't want to be a neglectful mommie! Newest foods include pasta and cauliflower-we haven't encountered a food yet that she won't eat! (maybe avocado but I haven't tried again recently)

We have some sad news-we had to put Zeppo down on Wednesday. His health failed very rapidly over the weekend and it was time. Chris and I are heartbroken. Zeppo has been with me since 1997. He was with me in Portland, Minnesota and Chicago. I miss him dearly.

We are off to Florida in less than 2 weeks and are looking forward to the visit.

So long for now.

Let the weaning begin!

Alright, maybe not right away but there are signs pointing in that direction. Nursing this last weekend while we were in Iowa was less than pleasant. Alert- this may be TMI for those readers (if there are in fact ANY still out there) who had issues with my nursing updates last September.
I had just sent an e-mail out to my lactation consultant to inquire about weaning techniques. She gave my some advise but I wasn't ready to start any time soon because everything was still so perfect...until Friday. I am so sore right now that I can hardly nurse. Liliana has taken the position that I am just a bottle or a toy. She grabs me with both hands and pulls my boob (excuse me, breast) out of her mouth while still sucking. Remember she also has 2 very sharp teeth now. She does this over and over and it hurts so much. Nursing when she is really tired is still okay but even at night she pulls a lot. So, in any case, I think the next step is to continue pumping at work and nursing her mornings and evenings but to give her formula or pumped milk from a bottle during the days of the weekends. Eventually moving to formula only and reduce my pumping until I am only producing enough for morning and evening feedings. This will lead to nightime feedings only and then none. My goal is to complete this transition by August. However, if the pain or behavior does not improve, I may have to move this time line up. Makes me very sad...

As I mentioned, we were in Iowa over the weekend to visit Frank and Beth and Chris' grandma. It was a very short trip and staying with Liliana in a hotel is getting more difficult now that she is on sleep schedule. Basically we either have to go to bed at 7:00 with her or keep her up until a more reasonable adult bedtime which isn't really fair to her. If we are staying in a house, at least we can put her in a room and go into another room to watch a movie or have a glass of wine with company. In any case, it made the trip a little difficult. Still, she traveled great in the car again- no complaints there!

No closer to crawling though she continues to stick her butt in the air while putting her face on the ground - that won't help much with forward propulsion but she will eventually figure that out.

Her personality is really coming out and it is apparent now that we need to really watch our own behavior around her because she seems to be taking it all in. She is sassy for sure. She swipes at me a lot and likes to scratch with her fingernails. I think it feels good to her but obviously not so much for me. As I type this I realize I have to wrap it up b/c she is mad at me for ignoring her. She is yelling at me to come play with her- really she does that.

Bye for now!

Sit, Stay....

Ah, well it has been one week since we returned from New Mexico. It was such a quick trip- too quick but we did get another plane ride under our belts. This one was much different. While at 3 months she nursed quietly, was unaffected by sounds, sights and strangers, at 7 months she held fascination in everything! Getting her to nurse or sleep during our air travel (or car travel) was near impossible. The good news is that she did not fuss. She was simply happy to observe the crazy cast of characters on the flight. She smiled, laughed and persisted to touch all the ickyness of the plane and then put said ickyness into her mouth. I am sure this is what led to her eye infection which has prevented us from attending our much enjoyed monthly playgroup this weekend.
All in all, the weekend was fun- she was off her sleep schedule which led to some crankiness the first day but by the wedding, she was in perfect form and was quite popular! In fact, one guest went so far as to call her TREMENDOUS. How is that for an adjective? She was passed around the table next to us by total strangers. Well, they were strangers to me but I reasoned that since they knew the groom, they probably would not kidnap my baby.

I can say she is finally sitting- almost unassisted! I still have to stay right by her because she will fall over. It is great though to see her sitting so proud and playing with her toys. She is also doing a lot of kicking. Trying to change a diaper has become a challenge. She flails her legs all over the place and kicks my hands away- I try and make a game out of it and it seems to work- 38% of the time.

Sleep is slightly challenging right now as I believe she is starting to manipulate me. She has my number that is for sure. When I put her in the crib she cries and reaches her arms out for me. It kills me and I must pick her up! I know, I know, let her cry it out or just rub her belly but come on, my baby is REACHING OUT for me! It is getting better though and she is still sleeping pretty well through the night.

She continues to try and love new food. Yesterday I made Chicken and Brown Rice- she ate it voraciously and so did the cats!

Next trip- Car ride #2 to Iowa. I anticipate this won't go as smoothly as it did when she was 2 months old.

Till next time!

On the Road Again

Just a quick note as it has been awhile. Liliana is doing great and mom has let go of her worries. She is very expressive and happy! We finally bought a high chair and she loves to sit up high and feels very proud when she is in it. She is eating like a champ. She eats 4 Tbls of cereal at a time!
We are off to New Mexico today for Patty Romero's wedding to David Thomson. Hopefully air travel with a 7 month old is as easy as it was with a 3 month old!
Liliana is starting to show some signs of moving toward crawling. She is trying to get her knees under her and ONCE she got on her toes and stuck her butt in the air... I give it another month.
She has 2 new teeth on the bottom row and when she laughs you can see them- very cute.
Well I am off for now but I promise to give a full report after our trip to the Land of Enchantment!

6th Month Checkup

Quick list of my concerns as I leave my 6 month check up. She has a benign heart murmur which could be part of a growth spurt. The doctor noted some developmental milestones that they check for have not been reached yet. She is absolutely not concerned but she should be rolling over from her tummy to back and she should also be rocking up on her knees. I pointed out that one of her eyes is squintier than the other so we have to schedule an appointment with a pediatric ophthalmologist. It could be a lazy muscle and it can be strengthened. Anyway, like I said, doctor really not concerned but she does want to see her in another 6 weeks to follow up. Other than that, she is growing well and everything else is great.
This appointment was particularly tough because she is getting a tooth, has a cold and then had her shots- poor baby.

Trying to keep up

Okay, every time Liliana does something new, cute or reaches another milestone I make a mental note that I need to blog about it. I plan on blogging on Sundays so by the time I sit down, I have forgotten the long list of notes. Either that, or the changes that are happening are occurring so quickly that what seemed new and novel on Monday is old hat by the following weekend! So from memory I will quickly mention some of the things I wanted to share in no particular order: Her tooth is, in fact, coming in. I can see and feel it and so can she! She has certainly been feeling the pain and it is causing her to wake throughout the night but she does put herself back to sleep. She is also sleeping more on her tummy and still hasn't found a way to roll back over. I am not concerned but Chris wakes me up throughout the night fearing that she is suffocating- it is getting a little tiring I tell you!

I hosted my playgroup yesterday. It was great fun and I am really grateful for these moms and friends. I love sharing stories, fears and all experiences with them. They are all unique in their parenting styles and are just a great group of women. I am so thrilled to have found them.

Liliana is starting to sit up a little. I can plop her down and let go and she sits for 30 seconds or so. I imagine by the time we go to New Mexico in 3 weeks she will be sitting on her own and have her first tooth clearly visible.

I feel like I am in a great place right now. Of course the economy stinks and we are feeling the effects from it but despite that I am really happy. Liliana just makes things so wonderful. I look forward to every moment I am with her. I love my new job-I haven't said that for a long time. All and all I feel at peace.

My parting story comes from a moment I had in the middle of the night last night. I went to Liliana because she kept waking up from her teeth and tummy sleeping. I intended to just roll her over but when I picked her up she reached out and hugged me-she started to do that recently. When I went to put her down she got very upset so I decided to nurse her. She nursed for awhile and was awake just starting up at me. She then fell into a deep sleep and the light from the moon (or streetlamp) was coming through the crack between the blinds and illuminating her face. She looked absolutely amazing...just perfect. She was so peacefully sleeping and her lips, nose, eyes, cheeks and eyelashes were highlighted. She looked angelic. I couldn't stop staring and wanted to cry from the purest love I have ever felt. I still can't believe she is mine. Everyone who knows me knows I am not a religious person but I know that I am truly blessed.

How Deep is Your Love?

My last post I left with the promise of feeding broccoli to baby. I must say she loved it but it ended up in the trash because it caused such horrible, miserable gas. She woke up every 2 hours screaming. It was a tough night. We will be sticking with sweet potatoes and pear for now. We have had a rough few days in fact. Last Monday I didn't have enough pumped milk so I made up a couple bottles of formula. She hasn't had formula since that short stint in September. Chris gave her the bottle and she eagerly downed 6 oz! When I came home from work, I nursed her and then put her in her crib while I sat on the floor of the nursery folding laundry. She started fussing a little and then began vomiting profusely! She must have done it 5 times-it was really scary. Just to summarize quickly, we went to the ER, never got seen by a doc but did have her vitals taken. She was fine. We determined it was the formula- not sure if it is just too rich or if she is lactose intolerant or it was just simply too much. Anyway, she is fine now.
She turns 6 months on Thursday and her changes are coming so quickly! So smiley (no longer serious baby), vocal and rolling like crazy. She just started rolling from back to tummy in the last 24 hours. It is really cool but has also been tough getting her to sleep tonight. She keeps waking herself up and then becomes very upset. If only she could learn to roll back over! Speaking of sleep, her schedule has changed. She used to sleep from 7:00am-5:00am or so. Now she wakes up around midnight, then 5:00 then up for the day at 7:00am. I guess this is normal so other than feeling more tired than I have been in the last couple of months, I am accepting it as just another phase.
Right now seems like the best stage yet. I love to make her laugh. I love the way she just stares at me and then smiles. The love has moved to yet another level- how deep can it go?

So many boogers, so little time

Well Liliana caught her first cold. A real cold, not a little sniffle or fussiness like she has had in the past. This one is full out snot coming out of the nose, consistent cough, watery eyes and general misery (for her and for us because she feels bad). She is actually in pretty good spirits considering- it just further highlights her easy going personality. Sleep has eluded her for the last couple of nights. She is waking up every 3 hours or so (thankfully it is the weekend). I am able to nurse her back to sleep but her congestion and coughing wake her up. I am debating about taking her in to the doctor tomorrow or waiting for a week until her 6 month check up. I suppose if she doesn't seem better or even worse we will go earlier. I have learned how much she HATES people messing with her face. Trying to wipe her nose is a challenge and trying to use the bulb syringe to clear out the snot is nearly impossible. When I do succeed with the syringe, she cries so hard and I feel horrible. I can't explain that I am doing it to help her- I do anyway but it doesn't seem to matter.

She also was suffering from constipation yesterday. I attribute it to the bananas as I read they are a common cause. She was pushing so hard yesterday that her face was turning red. I started to make and freeze baby food yesterday so I made some pear and prune puree. Not only did she love the taste, it seemed to work immediately in clearing her out. VERY successful concoction last night and the cure carried over to this morning...yes, I couldn't keep away from poop talk for too long. Today I am going to make broccoli and sweet potatoes. It is really easy to make the purees and I feel really good knowing that the food I feed her is all natural and organic.

I hope she feels better tomorrow because it will be hard to be away from her knowing she is sick.
As an update to the last post, I think I was wrong about the tooth. However, everyday she is more active and fascinating.

I got all my girlfriends (and boyfriends) and me!

Quick list here- time seems to be more and more precious.
We had a playdate yesterday with other August babies (and one October baby).
All the mommies work in my industry- it was fun!
Liliana is growing up so fast- instead of embracing it, I feel sad, but also excited- such a strange dichotomy of emotions.
I think she is getting a tooth- I feel something and I think I see something.
She just rolled from back to tummy- yeah!
Her poop is getting more poopish which makes me sad.
She is more smiley and interactive as ever.
She is in 6-9 month clothing and about to graduate to size 3 diaper.

That is all for now...

I Like Rice Cereal and I Cannot Lie

I really tried to hold out until the 6 month mark to introduce solids to Liliana (and by the way, I think Liliana is going to stick and Lily won't happen). But tonight, we ended up sort of unceremoniously giving her rice cereal. She was downing 21oz of milk between the hours of 9-5 and in addition to that, I was nursing her 3 times. She really seems fascinated when I would eat something so I decided that all signs pointed to her being ready...even if I wasn't. Okay, I know it is crazy, but it is just one of those things that marks her growing up. I am so excited to see what will happen next but it was a little sad at the same time. Even Chris felt a little sad. However, solids are only twice a day and we will still nurse at night during the week and all other feedings on weekends. So, it went really well. She really enjoyed the cereal and downed the whole bowl. She did seem to suffer gas about 45 min after but hopefully her system will acclimate quickly.

That is all I had to report at this time- video below!

The more things change...

A memory popped into my head the other day- more of a remembered feeling that I had on the way to the hospital the morning of August 26th. I was actually feeling GUILTY about removing Liliana from the security of the womb. I kept thinking, she isn't ready to come out yet- how unfair to cut me open and PULL her out! It is not that I am the type of person that thinks this is a cold, cruel world or anything- it just was a feeling I had. Now, as I see her experiencing the world around her, finding fascination in every little detail of a piece of fabric, I feel so amazing. She is a part of me, a part of Chris, but is Liliana. A tiny little person learning so much- one day she will be walking, going to school, going to work- kind of freaks me out b/c she is so little and, well, she is just a precious baby!

Work has been going well- the nanny situation is working out great too but we can barely afford it- not even sure if we can at all but we are making it work for now! Two things are a bit of a challenge for me since returning to work: The first involves pumping and trying to get enough milk for her to feed the following day. I won't go into detail but it is a challenge for me! The second is my insecurity about Liliana forgetting me when I am away. When I come home she wants to be held by me but is very serious. I guess I just expect her to smile and laugh when I walk in the door. I am also realizing that she seems to be a more serious, introspective little person. She certainly has her moments of smiling and laughing but often she is just absorbing the world around her with this thoughtful look. So, I am trying to get over that feeling and it goes away quickly once the weekend comes.

A couple of changes to note- she has found her feet! Also, she has taken a serious interest in reading- I mean it. When I read to her (part of our bedtime ritual) she looks at the pictures and then looks at my face intently- she really seems to enjoy it- I love it! Still not rolling over but I am not worried. She is going to be 5 months old on Monday. One more month and we will start rice cereal! My gosh she is just growing and changing so much. It is thrilling but also sad. I look at the picture on the top of the blog and see that sweet newborn face and I melt. I miss that but I love everyday and every change.

Stream of Consciousness

New year, new post-sorry for the lapse. At first, not much new was occurring and then too much was going on- I hope I can report all. To start, I did get a new job that I started yesterday. After several back and forth decisions, I chose to leave the rep group I worked for last year. There were many changes occurring, most important of which was my position becoming 100% commission. Though the potential to earn "bank" as the kids say ;-) was great, I just couldn't risk it in this economy. I was extremely fortunate to have been given the opportunity to interview with a company called Izzy. New friends I made through being pregnant with, and then having, Liliana work for this company. I am so excited to be a part of the small Chicago team because they are great people, it is a great product and it will be a lot of fun. Check it out at www.izzydesign.com.
Okay, so with this new job, it became imperative to find a nanny. I found a fantastic woman named Gaby who is from Peru. She is only available full days Tuesday and Thursday and half days Wednesday. I also found a terrific woman through Tammy named Sugey. She is Columbian and is available 1/2 days everyday. I can't give her the amount of hours she needs but she is being so great to fill in this week until Gaby starts next week. It is too bad she can't work just a couple of 1/2 days to cover where Gaby can't. In any case, at least we have something. It is hard getting out the door but it will get easier once I have a system down. Today I woke up at 5:00 and fed her back to sleep. I processed all of Chris' year end tax forms and before I knew it, I had to get going but wanted to feed Liliana one more time-she had an explosive poo etc etc...
Trying to pump at work isn't so bad b/c there are 2 of us pumping. Also, the company is so cool that the VP who is in town to get me up to speed remembers to take time for our "technical breaks" as he calls it.
After a full day away, it is so great to come home and see her but I only have 2 hours with her until she goes to bed...it is so hard. I am also feeling insecure that she will forget me. On a positive note, Chris and baby are bonding really well. He watched her 1/2 day yesterday and today and they are just really happy together- she turned that corner with him that we knew she would.

Alright, so going backwards in time now: New Years Eve was fun- we had a couple neighbors over and Liliana slept through the night from 7:00pm. The next day Doug, Jen and the girls came in town and we had so much fun. Rebecca and Emily were great with Liliana and kept her entertained. We went to the Frank Lloyd Wright studio and home, the Art Institute and Millenium Park. At the Art Institute and Frank Lloyd Wright I put her in the Baby Bjorn facing front for the first time- for the baby that loves to watch the world, this was the best thing ever! She loved every minute of it. I only wish I could see her face because apparently she was being awfully cute!
We had dinner at Gino's and also did a fun dinner at our house. It was so great to see them and makes me sad that they aren't closer. Having a baby with family to share the experience with is wonderful.

Reading back over this entry, I realize that I am less focused on Liliana things and more on my things. I guess part of that is going back to work but also because she has just been so good. I just am amazed everytime I look at her- so beautiful, sweet and wonderful. She now doesn't have to be nursed to sleep at bed time. She can put herself to sleep and I woke up a couple mornings ago to hear her just entertaining herself in her crib- I can't explain how amazing this whole experience is- I have never been happier...

On the 10th day of X-mas Weissbluth gave to me 11 hours of sleep!

Wow- Liliana will be 4 months old on Friday! She has her 4 month check up tomorrow which includes vaccinations- not looking forward to that but am curious to see how much she has grown!

She has been fighting a cold the last couple of days and hasn't quite been "herself" (whatever that means for a 17 week old). She isn't as smiley and vocal as she normally is but is still sweet and not super fussy. She is sleeping great through the night still and we are now starting a nap schedule. I try and get her to nap mid morning, early afternoon and possibly late afternoon if she seems tired. I was concerned how this would affect her night time sleep but, as Dr Weissbluth says, Sleep Begets Sleep...so true- she slept from 8:00pm to 7:30 am last night! Wow- and is currently down for a nap which she did on her own! I plunked her in her crib while I set up my "station" with my boppy, cell phone, coffee, water and laptop. When I went to get her, she was sound asleep at 9:30- perfect!

I took her last week to see Santa and she was great- she loved the mall- I think because the ceiling is so high and there was cool stuff up there for her to look at. She was laughing in line as I held her-it was cracking me up.

She is becoming so interactive-it is great but can also pose issues with feeding. Gone are the days of the sweet, calm nursing moments (well they are fewer and farther between). Now she is so interested in everything and she gets so easily distracted- when Chris walks in the room she whips her head around (ouch is all I can say). She is constantly doing that to look and smile at me, to watch her fingers move, to stare at the folds in my shirt, to stare at the cat etc, etc... I love it but it makes feeding difficult- I am not sure she is eating enough and it is a bit painful too!

I am starting to feel pressure to engage with her more- just not sure if I am doing enough to stimulate that brain of hers! I read to her, give her pictures to look at, tummy time (and back time) on her mat...I don't know why I am concerned that she is bored! Oh, by the way, she is no longer rolling over...I read this is normal but, of course, I am concerned... So, anyway, I am so excited to see all these changes but I just want to make sure I am doing my part to have a happy, fulfilled child without over stimulating- oh the pressure ;) Maybe it is time for me to get back to full time work..



I am waiting for an offer to come through for a new job- I should hear today...Once I do, I will have a better idea about what we can afford for childcare. I have many leads for nannies and a couple in home childcare options. I am anxious to get that put to bed so that I can start my new job without complications. I am very excited for this opportunity!! More details to follow once it is official.

Party Animal

Liliana was the hit of the party last night. She chose to break into full on laughter for the first time in front of an audience! Then she slept from 10pm until noon today (with a brief waking at 5:00am to feed...she rocks!

It's all in the Genes baby!

Okay, I totally stole this idea from a much more clever and funny blog managed by my friend Ashley and her fiance Gabe...
Some people say Liliana is a "spitting image" of me and others say Chris.
Above are baby pictures of me and Chris. Chris is the black and white one in case you couldn't figure it out by the smirk.
There is a poll to the left-
Have fun!

Learning Curve

Alright, the first 2 days at the office went pretty well. Granted I wasn't gone the full day but it is a start. I did forget my pump both days but have learned that the handicapped stall in the restrooms at the mart have an electrical outlet so I guess that is where I will be doin' my biz a couple times a day.
Day one: Plan was for Chris to watch the little one. I woke up at 6:00am to her cries. I nursed her back to sleep and put her back in the crib. It is now almost 7:00am-she nursed a LONG time! So far so good- I was able to pump, shower, dress and ALMOST get out the door. She woke up screaming as I was preparing to leave. Very odd- normally she doesn't do that. It is around 8:30 I think at this point. So I decide to nurse her again before I go- it is approaching 9:00am- good thing I don't punch a clock! Okay, now she is changed, fed and rested so I leave. All is great- chris calls around noon b/c she is being really cute and vocal. She takes 2 bottles while I am gone. I leave for home around 2:30 after Chris calls again because he thinks she is on the verge of a meltdown. By the time I get home after 3:00 they are happily enjoying each others company again. False alarm but I was glad to be home all the same. She was excessively fussy throughout the evening and slept a lot in my arms. I learned that Chris didn't squeeze the air out of the Playtex bottle and that he re-used the same liner after the first one sat out all morning with old milk! Rookie mistake I guess-I let it go but chalked up the fussiness to that. This morning all was fine.

Day 2: We took our neighbor Julia up on her offer to watch Lili. She watched her for about 3.5 hours until Chris got back from his job. They did great together. She took 2 bottles and I came home to feed her mid afternoon. She was sleeping on Chris' shoulder when I got back. We have been playing since then and now she is sleeping again. I am so pleased it worked with Julia b/c it would be great to have her as a consistent caretaker. We need to figure out a schedule so that we aren't winging it day to day. I guess I am just not quite prepared yet to be back at work. I am getting there though!

Speaking of work, I met with the "boys" today and have learned (confirmed) that come Jan 1 I will be on a commission only basis. I will become an equal player in the rep group but am giving up a lot in terms of car allowance, parking paid, entertainment expenses etc. But with great risk comes great reward right? It is scary but is really the only way I will ever get ahead financially. I can also bring on new lines to build my own business- I have high hopes it will all work out. Hopefully with the news of lower interest rates Chris' business will pick up too. Already we see signs- 3 jobs tomorrow and 2 on Monday!
I feel very optimistic and hopeful for the future.

Jetset

It was a successful trip out to santa fe. Traveling with Lili was a piece of cake. We were able to secure a 3rd seat for her car seat on the way there and back though she wasn't in the seat too often. She mostly nursed, slept and looked around curiously. On the way there she cried briefly after an uncomfortable stint on the airplane lavatory changing table.

We ended up staying in Santa Fe 4 days longer than originally anticipated because we wanted to spend more time with friends and family. She met her Uncle Garry , Aunt Brittany , cousins Zoe and Nate, Great Aunt Barbara and Great Grandpa Kaufman. I should have been blogging all along to capture all that happened because as I sit here trying to reflect on the week it is one big blur. I came away from the visit with one main feeling: our baby is awesome! Seriously...hardly fusses, is truly cute and did great in all social situations. She was passed around at parties, had a photo shoot, was oggled over at the retirement home and was the coolest kid the whole time. Which makes it even sadder that I am back at work.
Tomorrow I am leaving the comfort of "working remotely" and venturing into the showroom and making client calls. Considering we still don't have any care options set up, this is tough. Chris will be watching her. I have 2 feedings pumped and Chris asked me tonight "what angle do I feed her at 45?" Oh God what have I done? My bad for ALWAYS nursing her. We are so ill prepared for this.
I imagine there is a better post coming after tomorrow.

Raspberries!

Unfortunately we ran out of battery and didn't capture the real hearty giggles but here is a taste of her first laugh!!

Little Milestones

When I see a little glimmer of advancement I run to the computer to document it. I am so aware of every minute change in her behavior. What I am realizing though is that I am just seeing a glimpse of an even more acutely developed behavior. For example, she is REALLY engaging now with her dangly toys on her play gym. She is batting at them and gets excited when she sees something new. I imagine this is only going to become even more obvious in the weeks to come. It is so exciting but at the same time very sad for me because I am returning to work in a couple of weeks. I don't want to miss ANYTHING. I am so afraid I will miss her sit up for the first time, crawl, speak...I am actually very fortunate that my job does not require me to be away from her 9 hours a day, every day, but I am still already mourning the loss of spending every moment with her. Even as I type this, she is on her play mat and I can't stop looking at her.
She is getting so big too! She is in her 3-6 month clothes now. Not sure her weight but we need to pop over to the doctor next week to get some note for the airline- hopefully a quick weigh in will be done.
She has a pretty obvious case of cradle cap which I am trying to stay on top of but it just keeps re-appearing. It will go away soon I imagine.
Chris and I say every day that we don't want her to change from how she is presently but then she smiles at me so big and bright, and she didn't do it yesterday, and then I realize that all the changes make me love her even more- even when I didn't think that was possible...

Roll Over Liliana

The Laws of Physics

First of all, I want to express how excited, hopeful and relieved we are here in the Kminek household that Obama was overwhelmingly elected president!!
We voted early so election day was very relaxed. The weather here was beautiful- 72 degrees and sunny. We met our new friends Ashley and her baby Ezra for lunch here in Oak Park. We ate lunch in the park and strolled for a little bit. It was a really wonderful afternoon that was capped off with an explosive poo- yes, I mentioned Poo again, did you expect anything less? Just to get it all out, my world now consists of spit up, poo, sticking my nose right up to baby butt to sniff for poo...and I wouldn't trade it for anything!
Okay, back to the explosive poo. It basically determined that it was bath time. Most times I get in the bath with Liliana and she sits in her bath seat. I didn't feel like getting in the bath so I sat on the outside of the tub while bathing her. She LOVES the bath by the way- just like mom! Chris came in the bathroom and decided he wanted to get in the tub with her which I thought was a great idea. What I didn't think about was the effects of a 200+ lb person getting in a full tub of water...yes, the water came up so high and Liliana went under for a millisecond. I was so completely freaked out! She started crying and Chris felt horrible. I was worried she would hate baths from here on out. Chris promptly got out and she stopped crying and went back to enjoying her bath...thankfully! I felt so horrible though. I had my hand on her the whole time but I felt guilty because I am supposed to watch her and keep her safe. She is so helpless and 100% reliant on us and we were so stupid that we put her in a harmful situation. Luckily no harm done though...
On the developmental front, she seems to be reaching mini milestones. She is smiling a lot more and has become aware of her hands. Beth mentioned that it is so funny when it happens. Suddenly her hand goes by her face and her eyes follow it like- "whoa, look at that". She is also grasping more and batting at objects. We have put the toy part on her bouncy seat which lights up and makes noise when she bats at the animals. It teaches her cause and effect. Not sure if she has made that connection yet but when she is in the zone she bats at the animals a lot. We are reading to her more now too. I read the Hungry Caterpillar and How Much Do I Love You. She likes the pictures in Hungry Caterpillar. I also bought a few Baby Faces books and she is enthralled. Her attention span for them is short but those first few baby faces make her smile so much and she is glued to the pictures.
Her sleeping has been really pretty good the last few days. Lots of napping and no problem going down at night. She will sleep 4-5 hours the first stretch before waking up. Then it is 2.5-3 hour stretches after that. What I have realized is what is true today may not be true tomorrow. When I complain about her sleeping then the next few days she is a sleeping rock star. Then I brag about that and she goes to being a sleep deprived zombie for a couple of days. I think the net total though is that we have a really great baby- no major crying issues, no major sleep issues. We are so deeply in love with her-more everyday. I can't wait for her to meet family in 3 weeks!

Road Warrior

Well we successfully made our first car trip to Iowa this last weekend-more about that in a moment.
First things first-she had her 2 month appointment yesterday which was quite traumatic for us. It was the fateful vaccination day. She was double teamed by the nurses-one on each leg in order to give 2 shots at the same time. I was standing next to her with my hand on her but couldn't look. When they were done, I looked at her face and it crumpled, turned bright red and out came a cry that I have never heard before. After the initial cry, her mouth was wide open but she couldn't breath in. The nurse told me to blow on her to get her to breath in- AWFUL I tell you! I asked if I could stay in the exam room to nurse her and they let me. It calmed her down for the time being. We brought her home and she seemed fine-I left her with Chris around 5:30 to go to a kickboxing class. When I returned at 7:30 the downstairs was completely dark. I took in the evidence: the bottle I left was empty, her medicines were side by side on a tray in the den (mylicon and Zantac), there was a broken glass on the kitchen floor. I went upstairs and found Chris and baby in her nursery on the couch. She was peaceful and sleeping on his shoulder but Chris had this battered look about him. Apparently she started crying hysterically as soon as I left and never stopped. We tried to put her down in the crib but she started crying in her sleep. I tried to nurse her but was crying while trying to eat- she has never done that before- nursing has always calmed her down. We eventually got to the point where she was sleeping and only waking every 20 min or so with a cry and then going back to sleep. We called the doctor at 10:00pm and she confirmed it was most likely the shots. She suggested Tylenol so Chris was sent out to a 24 hour Walgreens. It seemed to work! She is fine now but WOW that was awful.
Here are her stats: Weight- 11.4 oz!!!
Length- 22.5 in (I think, I need to confirm)- bottom line- she is thriving!
I brought up my poop concern with the doc and she recently read an article that basically said- TREAT THE INFANT, NOT THE POOP. With that said, she is healthy so I could care less what color her poop is.

Back to the trip to Iowa...She was perfect! She slept most of drive there and back. We only stopped 1 time at the DeKalb Oasis to feed her and change her. She got to meet Gobbie (Chris' grandmother) Frank and Beth (Chris' Brother and sister in Law) and her cousins. She hardly fussed all weekend- a real trooper. It was kind of a pain being out of our routine for me though. Hotel room living, especially a Comfort Inn that has gone downhill, sucks. I didn't want her touching the bedspread or blanket because I am so creeped out by hotel linens- thanks a lot Dateline NBC.
Oskaloosa, IA is, however, the place of the purchase of her first stuffed animal that we have creatively named Lambie (as he is a Lamb). I hope she is as good when we fly to New Mexico next month!

POOP!

Arrrgh- green slimy poo again!
I will ask the doctor on Monday about it.
We are going to Iowa to see Chris' Grandmother and Brother (and family). We leave on Friday morning.
Should be an interesting trek in the car...
Will post after the journey- stay tuned!

Status Quo

Not really much to report because everything is going great.
We are getting out quite a bit to meet other moms/babies for lunches. We also made a 90 minute trek out to a party this last weekend. She was really well behaved and actually was content in her new Weego carrier. She slept the entire party but we did have one issue to contend with... people touching her without asking or washing their hands. Maybe I am being overly protective but I don't want strangers who have been outside all afternoon eating and drinking coming up and touching her head. I appreciate that they think she is beautiful and want to admire her but we ended up in the bathtub at 10:30pm washing cigarette stink off her noggin. How do you politely tell people to keep hands off?

She is also loving her swing finally- she hated it at first but now it is a guaranteed sleep inducer- plus it plays classical music that actually sounds pretty decent...she will be a well rested, cultured baby. She really is starting to notice objects like the bear mobile above the swing. She stared at them until she fell asleep.

The GERD is under control but not totally gone- it is manageable though. Nursing is almost perfect (who woulda thought that was possible).
Poop is great though she grunts like a grown man when she is trying to go!

We are gearing up to travel to Santa Fe next month and to get back to work. I have to say that I am not ready to return to work. That is all I will say at this point b/c I don't want to think too much about it right now but I need to get on the ball and figure out what we are doing for childcare!

This entire experience is so wonderful- I am so IN LOVE with my baby it is truly inexplicable (except to other moms who smell what i'm cookin'!)

Baby Horoscopes: Find out what the stars say about your little one!

Many people believe that the astrological sign your baby is born under can influence her personality, interests, talents, and who she'll best develop relationships with later in life. Here's the inside scoop on what to expect, with a little

View >>

growing...

Quick weight update-
9lbs 8oz
She gained 6 oz from last monday after only gaining 1 oz the week before. I personally suspect the original weigh in of 9.1 was incorrect...
Also, she is losing her soft, silky hair in the front...looks more like her daddy everyday;)

new update: first true smile in response to me- just now!

Hooray

Well it looks like the Zantac is kicking in. She is a lot less miserable than she has been. We both slept until 8:30 this morning! That was after a marathon feeding at about 1:30- Now that I can nurse without so much drama, I have learned to "nap nurse" her lying down. It is great b/c we can both just lie in the dark while she nurses. She ate voraciously for 45 min and then sort of slept and nursed for another 15-20 more. I can't believe how much she slept after that. I actually had to wake her to take her meds and eat again. She needed the sleep because she has not been napping during the day- she is sound asleep on me right now. She is a very attached baby. She does not like to be alone at all-not sure if that is inherant in her personality or a creation of mine.

Poop Scoop: It has been a great seedy yellow but this morning it was a slimy green which indicates a food allergy. I am going to cut out dairy right away just to see if it is a cow's milk allergy. The milk in coffee and cereal can easily be replaced with soy or rice milk- I will miss my cheese though- I eat cheese and crackers daily...

Now that she isn't s fussy, we can do a little tummy time- see video... (amateur at best- taken with my camera as a trial run to see how video looked)

Zantac

Well she has been taking Zantac for 3 days now and I think the medication is finally working! She is pretty much on a daily regimen of Zantac and Milicon right now- thank god for meds! She still is not sleeping much during the day though (and night)- she is so tired but can't let go. I can get her to fall asleep but she easily wakes up and then is fussy- this could all be from the GERD though so we will see...I also have the fear that maybe she isn't getting enough to eat so I feel we are constantly nursing- she only gained 1 oz last week. The doc isn't concerned though but we do have a weigh in next week just to be sure.
She is starting grasp things now- she grabbed my fingers in each fist and wouldn't let go. She also grabs my hair when I am carrying her and won't let go.
I am starting to see the signs of baby acne on her beautiful skin- I know it is totally normal and I promise I won't mess with it but I hate to see her perfect complexion with red marks!
So, all in all it has been a very challenging week but nothing we can't handle!
Pictures to follow soon I promise!

GERD

Well it looks like she has GERD (acid reflux). This is so hard. I can hardly stand to watch her suffer like she is. There is really nothing you can do other than keep her upright and angle her mattress for sleeping. They rarely medicate babies for GERD though Chris seems to want her medicated. He is less patient with her crying. It really is one of the most difficult things to deal with but for me it is because I just can't stand her suffering- it truly is heart breaking.
I understand that she will outgrow it but until then there is little we can do except modifications of feeding and sleeping positions.

Happy 1 Month Birthday!

To celebrate, we have finally pooped- 3 times in the last 3 hours- yeah! By we I mean Liliana- though I share a lot of info on this blog I am not sharing my personal bathroom habits...
Formula sucks- I hate it and it makes her miserable- gas and constipation.
She is back to nursing as I am feeling much better and so is she!

One milestone I noticed is she looks AT me more than beyond me. She still seems more enamored with the corner of a wall or the ceiling fan but at times she will stare at my face-

We will celebrate her 1 month on this earth this evening- pictures to come...

A Particularly Difficult Time

The last couple of days have been tough for me. To preface, imagine all that is going on is while I am topless. This is per doctor's recommendation. I am not healing at all but I have not helped matters any by wearing nursing tanks with gauze and ointment. I have created a warm, dark, moist environment- perfect for cultivating yeast cultures! Too bad I am not an 8th grade science experiment. I am so frustrated with myself b/c I feel I have made null and void the last 2 weeks of twice daily pill popping. So, I sit here for the 2nd day straight trying to air out but I don't think it is working. I am still in so much pain and now there is nothing there to protect me from the pain when I try and hold Liliana close...and boy she has needed to be held A LOT lately.
She is suffering from bad gas and not frequent pooping. She used to poop several times daily and yesterday she went only once. She has yet to go today. I suspect, as I mentioned yesterday, it is from the formula. The pain from the gas is also preventing her from sleeping. I will feed her, she will fall asleep and minutes later she wakes up screaming in pain. She is easily consolable but it cycles like this constantly. I am trying everything to help her pass gas- I finally sent Chris out to get Mylicon which helped her a little (a couple of little toots) but I have yet to see a poop. I am afraid when it finally does come it will be an explosion like yesterday- it was EVERYWHERE!
I am doing all I can to not give her formula which means I am basically tied to the pump. I have also started nursing her on the less damaged side which is working out okay except now I don't know how much she is consuming! I think I got a little spoiled with the bottles b/c I know for certain that she just ate 4oz and that I wasn't denying her. Now, she can be at the breast for 30 min, fall asleep, wake up and show major hunger cues and I don't know what they are all about! Is she really still hungry or just needing to suck? I know I nursed exclusively for 3 weeks and didn't have this concern but now it has entered my world and it is stressing me out.

So here I sit, topless, in the den, which is the only room downstairs with window treatments. This is where I have been for the last 36 hours with the exception of sleep time. I have Liliana on my lap briefly sleeping and I am typing off to the side. My pump is in arms reach to the other side. The cleaning lady just left and I am eyeing a nugget of something on the otherwise clean kitchen floor. I suspect it is a poop- a solid poop left by the cat that hasn't pooped anything solid in the last 3 years. Seriously! My poor little baby is struggling to poop and here goes the cat- leaving a perfectly formed poop in my site line- cruel and, possibly, an example of irony- not quite sure though-that word is never used correctly.
As Liliana stiffens her legs from the pain, she, without fail, kicks me right at her food source- I am in SO MUCH PAIN- I want it to go away NOW.
I must say though that my resolve to breastfeed this child is strong- I am not giving in- I didn't realize how passionate I would feel about this but I am surprising myself!
The other thing that surprises me is my complete lack of frustration with the baby. I feel only empathy for her and I don't feel angry or annoyed-I just want to hold her close and make her feel better- what frustrates me is that I can't do that easily b/c of the pain.
When she is trying particularly hard to poop she looks like a cross between Robert DeNiro and Steven VanZandt's character on the Sopranos.
In any case-this is today-tomorrow will be another experience- all are memorable and all are absolutely worth it.

4 Weeks Old!

I can't believe it has been 4 weeks.
Everything is going so fast.
Liliana weighed in at a healthy 9lbs 1 Oz yesterday! She is doing great on a combination of formula and pumped milk- this is the route I am taking now b/c I am still not healing well.
The green poop I mentioned before was a result of ingesting blood during feedings. This is my own diagnosis. She was spitting up a lot of blood so I stopped nursing. The result was beautiful (if you want to call it that) yellow poop! I am very frustrated with the fact that I am not healing. I am at the point now where I am beginning to accept that fact that I probably won't be able to nurse but now I am worried that I won't get rid of this infection or pain!
I have 2 more months of maternity leave and I am already sad about leaving her when I return to work! I don't know how people do it after 6 weeks- it is simply not enough time.
I am starting to get a little house crazy and am looking to get out of the house more and connect with other people.
Chris and I took Liliana to the Oaktoberfest on Saturday- there were a lot of people there with very young babies. It felt good to be out of the house socializing!
I also have plans on Thursday to meet someone that I met through a friend on facebook. She is also from Santa Fe, lives in Chicago and has a new baby. I am looking forward to chatting with another new mom!
Liliana still continues to have a great demeanor. She is generally easy to sooth when upset. Lately though she has been more fussy. I attribute this to formula. She has a little more tummy issues with the formula but once she gets through that she is completely calm again- you can tell that she just wants to poop! Breastmilk apparently is a natural laxative so she has less issues when nursing or drinking more pumped milk (I can only pump so much though and must supplement with formula).

I have booked our tickets to Santa Fe for Thanksgiving and am looking forward to the trip but am trying to figure out the logistics of the travel. I didn't realize how complicated it was- do we send our extra car seat base to Santa Fe? What do we do with the car seat/carrier- do they check it below the airplane with the stroller? Do I trust that- what if it gets damaged and then is unsafe? Do we have to drive to the airport and park the car? I will figure it all out but if anyone has suggestions I am open to them- I know people travel with infants all the time!

Paranoid first time Mom

Now that the focus has shifted a bit off my own pain and issues, I am transferring concern and worry onto Liliana- why does her poop suddenly resemble pesto and is no longer that perfect yellow color it is supposed to be? Why is she fussier than she was last week? Why did she projectile vomit about 6 oz of milk right into my face while we were lying in bed only inches apart? (think exorcist). I run to the internet, to my "baby bible" or the phone to get answers to these questions. They range anywhere from- totally normal, no need to be concerned or sounds like food allergies to could be cause for concern- call your doctor. So far I am remaining calm and am waiting for our appointment on Monday to confirm all is okay. She doesn't have a fever and seems to be eating plenty. In fact, I suspect the projectile incident was a result from over feeding. I am learning not to mis-read her hunger cues. Sometimes she does the fist in the mouth even after a very long feeding when all she really wants to do is suck on a finger to sooth her. Before, I was either nursing her again or giving her pumped milk from a bottle. The night she went Linda Blair on me she had nursed 2 times for 30 min each AND had 4oz from a bottle b/c she kept acting hungry and was crying A LOT. I think we made matters worse b/c her tummy was probably too full. As we get to know eachother better, I realize that she just needs to be soothed so a finger in her mouth to suck on works wonders!
Hopefully next Monday will reveal that all is okay, green poop is green poop and not a sign of my milk being "imbalanced", that she is gaining weight and is all around healthy as I suspect she is...

So I have heard

Alright, I have been told by more than one person that my blog entries are TMI (for a brother) and kind of a turn off- talk about the baby already!
Point taken- sorry, I guess I didn't realize people were actually reading this so thanks!

Update

The lactation consultant doesn't really know what is going on b/c I am doing everything right yet Liliana is doing something funky with her tongue when latching on- this is new- she hasn't always done this...
On a different note though, I have yeast infection of the breasts! This is what is causing so much pain but I am on a 2 week Diflucan regimen and already feel the difference.

Now about the baby (I feel bad that I want to write about her but it always comes back to my boobies!) She seems amazingly alert and interactive for a 2 week old- she frequently has her eyes open and is taking in whatever it is she can see at this point. We also swear she is smiling and it isn't gas!!
She seems happiest when just in a diaper and I have learned that she LOVES being carried in a sling- I think it mimics the womb very well- now she can nap and I can do laundry at the same time!

She had been sleeping part or all of the nights in bed with us as I was so exhausted by nighttime that after nursing I just plopped her down next to me. She seems to sleep very well nuzzled next to me but I know that so many people think this is a no no and could be harmful etc..It just feels so nice. Anyway, we did put her down in her crib last night and she slept there the whole night.

She is such a sweaky, wonderful little thing- Chris and I say more than once a day how lucky we are...

What a Love!

I am amazed at the love that is developing for little Liliana.
It is just so intense- I can stare at her face forever.
My mom was in town this last week and helped out a lot- I am on my own now but feel I have a pretty good routine down and am finally feeling better (not achy and fluey like before) so I actually have energy and desire to do chores around the house! Now I just have to put the baby down so I can get it done! She just loves to sleep on me though and wakes every time I put her in the bassinet or crib.
I have the lactation consultant coming back today because I am still having trouble with the latching and am re-damaging myself! It is so unbelievably frustrating- I can't figure out what I am doing wrong- I feel like I am doing everything correctly yet it comes out all wrong- I just don't know what to do to fix it- I really hope this follow up visit will help- this situation is tainting what otherwise would be the most blissful experience. Don't get me wrong, it is truly fantastic but getting sweaty palms every time I have to feed her because I am anticipating excruciating pain and knowing I am reversing the healing process truly just sucks.
All that aside, we are so in awe...

More nursing woes-but I am on the mend

I originally was going to post this entry with details about all the trouble I have been having but I am in a much better place right now so in a nutshell: Was in so much pain that I simply couldn't imagine latching on one more time, I tried to pump but yielded hardly any milk. I simply broke down crying in the middle of the night feeling like a horrible mother who wasn't able to provide for her baby the way she wanted to. I reluctantly, very reluctantly, allowed my mom to give her a bottle of formula on Thursday morning just so she had food intake. It was a very rainy day on Thursday and I literally sat all day pumping as much milk as I could so i could keep my supply up and have milk for Liliana. Well, I had a lactation consultant come in yesterday (Friday) and we worked through things. Between fine tuning the actual feedings and getting the name of prescription cream to help me heal, I am on the mend. I feel so much better and the feedings are going great. She gained 6oz from Tuesday to Friday.
Word of advice for any future first time moms. DO NOT leave the hospital without proper instructions from a lactation consultant if you are experiencing ANY PAIN. It is not right and it should not hurt. I feel very frustrated and let down by Prentice Hospital b/c I feel I was given poor guidance and information. I can't tell you how many people I told about the pain and the soreness which turned to bleeding while I was there. They all told me it would heal on its own blah blah blah...
Onto other things, it has been such a whirlwind here. I have lost complete track of time but it is great. Liliana still continues to be unbelievably well behaved and is getting more alert and active by the minute! I have added new pictures to the slideshow of All Things Liliana and will continue to do so until I run out of space so check the Picassa sight periodically if you are interested.
Mom has been a great help and Chris continues to amaze me with what he is doing. He is cooking and cleaning and grocery shopping and just being all around fantastic.

TMI but I must share...

I mentioned before how much I love nursing-I do and I don't want to give it up for anything-Here is an example of how passionate, or crazy, I am. Please share with me if any of you out there have had an experience like this because I am kind of freaked out...
So I have sore nipples. Not just sore, but cracked, bleeding, so incredible painful that it is miserable (I did title this entry as TMI so don' t say I didn't warn you).
Liliana and I are a great team when it comes to nursing. She has a great latch and I am perfecting several holds: the football, the side lying and the cross cradle. It has become quite easy but it hasn't always been that way...The first couple of days were difficult and we didn't have the latch quite right hence, the state my nipples are currently in...( I have decided to not be shy about sharing information like this- it is part of the experience that I want to keep real and true)
So last night right after her bath and minutes before we had my neighbors and my dad's friend over for dinner I went to get Liliana dressed. She was just kickin' it in her crib checking out her surroundings and making cute little noises. She turned her head made a little cough and out came coagulated milk mixed with blood and a bloody piece of tissue. I was totally scared and freaked but realized the ONLY thing it could be was from feeding-yes from my nipple (I have never typed that word so many times before). I called the doctor and she agreed that is probably what it was. She is fine otherwise, eating, pooping, peeing, sleeping, temperature etc...
Seriously! Does this happen? What is strange is my feeling about it- I feel guilty. I feel bad that she had to ingest that and she so innocently coughed it up.
I continue to nurse b/c the pain is only at the beginning and then it feels fine (but it is excruciating at the beginning). I hear that they do heal even with continued nursing so I am keeping my fingers crossed!

We had a nice visit from my dad the last couple of days and are awaiting arrival of my mom tomorrow!
Last night our neighbors came over for dinner and they were a HUGE help in the kitchen- thank you Joe so much for your help. We have fantastic friends and neighbors who are being so kind and giving.

Liliana continues to sleep very well and has allowed me to sleep very well too. She is a fantastic baby so far- not fussy, great eater and sleeper and the cutest baby in the world.
I just need to learn to put her down once in a while...